Grey Goose

September 5, 2011

I’ve always looked young for my age. When I was 24, I got carded at the movies. I’m finally getting to the point in life when this sometimes a good thing, but it’s still often really effing annoying. Like when Handsome and I are out on a date and I realize I’ve forgotten my purse and the server won’t bring me a glass of wine because I don’t have ID. [I am paying a BABYSITTER to not have this drink, you knob.]

I think a big part of this older-than-you-look thing is because I am roughly the same size and shape I was when I was in 7th grade. I stopped growing when I was 12. Pretty much everywhere. It’s only that now, I have wrinkles, a baby on my hip, and the ability to shoot lasers out of my eyes, so people sometimes believe that I’m over 30.

My hair doesn’t really help. It’s on the lighter end of the spectrum, so I have some veryveryvery blonde hairs, but no grey hairs. In fact, I used to look at my friends’ heads and wonder if they knew how much grey hair they had. Should I tell them? Maybe they don’t know it’s there? Occasionally, I would examine my own crown for grey hairs. Suspects always proved to be blonde, though. That, or the data was inconclusive. (That’s what a scientist in denial sounds like, by the way.)

Well a few weeks ago, I was driving around town and I looked down to see a loose hair of mine. That sucker was steel grey from root to tip, and it was loooooong. Long enough to have gotten married, a PhD, retired, had a baby, and moved four times. My jaw dropped, and there was an audible little “pop” as a bubble burst, somewhere. That hair had been growing covertly for years (and adding insult to injury, it was a damning indictment of my sampling methods…).

I think I’ll take it out for a drink.

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5 Responses to “Grey Goose”

  1. coolbana said

    Ha!
    Don’t forget your ID!

    No, don’t tell your friends how many gray hairs they have! I have finally acknowledged that my “highlights” are in fact gray hair! My hairdresser told me more than 10 years ago I had a few “premature” grays. I told her my age (same as her mom!) and she decided that they were not premature at all.

  2. Dianne said

    Enjoy those days of carding..and other things that we take for granted..You look great!! No Ivy aging signs at all!

  3. So the question is, will you color or age gracefully and let yourself go gray?

  4. Here’s to aging grey-cefully!!

  5. I regularly take my greys out for a good time. They love dinner and dancing. Maybe you could join us?

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